Thursday, April 29, 2010

WARNING: If None of This Makes Sense It's Because I'm Totally Drunk. Thanks.

I actually got my Jewish boyfriend to go out tonight at 12:30am and we "enjoyed" an interesting night at a local New Brunswick hangout. It's not the most glamorous thing but it's okay on a night with nothing else going on. It's acceptable and I actually like the little outdoor area they have. I don't know - if I had my choice of anywhere on earth to be right now I wouldn't even know what to say. You only consider what's normal from your own experience, right? Luckily, I've never had a normal experience in my life.

My boyfriend loves normal things and strives to be a normal, well adjusted, motivated individual. I disagree with his entire way of life personally. I'd prefer one extreme or the other: exceptionally sophisticated, poetry loving professor or totally free spirited, laid back Jason Mraz-type guy but he's somewhere in between I guess. I don't know. I love the idiot - for better or worse. I've been with him long enough. There has to be SOMETHING good. I don't know anyone that has been with their partner as long as we've been together. I think many would be surprised to know we've been together 6 1/2 years. It's shocking to even write. What are we doing correctly? Are we?

Relationships are incredibly tricky. I can't stop myself from thinking other men are gorgeous but I'd never go much further than that. I'm not a big believer in monogamy but yet I've been monogamous for so long now. I can't wrap my mind around it.

I drank quite a bit tonight, although it's never enough for me, a wonderfully advanced aspiring alcoholic, but still - I can't get my mind around it.

I talk about my lovely close friend a lot - a male - and we get a long incredibly and have so much love for each other it's ridiculous but my boyfriend is still the guy I come home to. He's a good person in a million ways. I may refer to his religion often but I do love him. He's just got a lot of flaws. So do I. I'm just much cooler and way more fun.

I wish I knew more people who drank. Margaritas particularly. I can't promise that if a Spanish Robert Downey, Jr. hit on me tomorrow I wouldn't be tempted... but then again there's no place like home... and that's with Steve.

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